Sadness Prevails

I had to say farewell to Buckshot this morning. He was bleeding from both nostrils when I went down to feed him and he had not eaten a thing since yesterday afternoon.

Jack told me he would make all the arrangements and he did. (Where did I find that man? He is the best in the world.)

The vet said I had made the right choice to put Buckshot down because he was jaundiced and dieing from most likely a tumor on his liver.

I don't even know how I made it through the day other than the kids were very compassionate and I was surrounded with love and hugs from everyone.

I'll never forget the day I bought Buckshot. I took one look and fell madly in love. I rode him around a barn and through some cows in a field. He took off running and I never did tell anyone that I couldn't stop him even though I tried my best! And I still put my money down. Then he wouldn't load in the horse trailer... should have been another sign but oh how I wanted that beautiful Arab/Paint gelding!
His name was "Buck". (I still didn't get the clue!) When I rode him and he bucked every time, I finally realized I may have bit off more than I could chew. Instead, Jack suggested I rename him to Buckshot so I did. Then I worked on him to stop that nasty habit of bucking.
Worked like a charm. Once we were on the same page, he never bucked with me or anyone else on his back ever again.
He came when I whistled, no matter how far away he was or no matter what he was doing. He was always eager to greet me in person and exchange some loving.

He turned out to be the most gentle and kind horse ever. The kids could walk between his legs, he was so mellow. And he loved to give them a ride on his back.

He followed us around like a dog. No matter where we went, Buckshot was there.

He was my place of refuge.

He was my buddy.

He was the balm on my rotten days.

I'm going to miss him something fierce.

(For those of you trying to call me....our phones are all out. So e-mail me for now.)